


Somebody Ate The Ferret, But they Didn't Eat the Deputy

by Thadeus



Series: Police Academy, Except for Real This Time [1]
Category: Psych
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, BAMF!Lassie, Cannibalism, Dubious Consent, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Whump
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-09-09
Updated: 2013-09-09
Packaged: 2017-12-26 04:03:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 654
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/961351
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Thadeus/pseuds/Thadeus
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A one night stand with Shawn Spencer seemed like a great idea at the time, but now it's morning. Cadet Carlton Lassiter is sober and ready to move on with his life at the Academy. Except now Shawn just won't go away, a Cadet turns up dead, the Academy mascot is missing and it all seems to be connected somehow. If only Lassiter could figure out how.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Somebody Ate The Ferret, But they Didn't Eat the Deputy

Lassiter first noticed the bright-eyed man at Karaoke Thursday, which had been ironically moved to Wednesday night, since the instructors had tutor duties on Thursday evenings. It was hard not to notice him. The Man stumbled onto the stage with all the grace of a drunken giraffe, took the mic in two hands and belted out three verses of Bohemian Rhapsody, out of order, while the speakers blared Burton Cummings.

The Man had found Lassiter staring, just as he hit “thunderbolts and lightning”, which Lassiter was okay with, though yes, it was a tad uncomfortable to be under the scrutiny. And he was sat way in the back, almost against the wall, hidden by dark shadows and nursing his fifth tumbler of whiskey. So it's not like he openly invited the attention.

When the song ended, The Man stumbled off the stage, both fists pumped into the air, amidst a small scattering of both joyful and negative reactions. 'Mostly negative,' Lassiter had thought, since the joyful noises seemed to be more of a mocking nature.

Lassiter swished the amber liquid around in the small tumbler, a thin smile rising onto his face, as he watched the swirls of the inverted liquid tornado.

“Looks good on you,” a voice commented. Lassiter startled, shot his head up to see which of his classmates had come to harass him. It was The Man. Not a classmate, definitely not otherwise Lassiter would recognize him, and too young to be a teacher. There was a familiarity though, but Lassiter just couldn't put his finger on it.

“What?” Lassiter asked, brow furrowed.

“Your smile,” The Man replied. He flashed one of his own, leaned forward and parked himself directly blocking Lassiter's view of the stage. “You were watching me.”

“You were on stage,” Lassiter grunted. “Everyone was watching you.”

“Flattering, but not so!” The Man grinned, eyes creasing half-closed, and, without looking, pointed toward a pair of women in the opposite corner. “They weren't watching. They were making out. Getting a little tongue-on-tongue action.”

Lassiter shrugged.

The Man moved then, with more grace than Lassiter had originally thought possible given the man's drunken state. He stood between Lassiter's feet, bent forward, hot breath whispering against the outer rim of Lassiter's ear. Lassiter felt his throat tighten up, and his hands shake as a shiver blasted down through him, like a lightening bolt. "You jealous?" The Man asked, suggestively. "Looking to get a bit of kissing done here, tonight, of your very own?"

Lassiter pushed his physical response away, then glared up at The Man, steely eyes filled with defiance. "Back off, I'm not that way."

"Really?" The Man raised an eyebrow leaned back, meeting Lassiter face to face. "I think you're telling lies. Leggy blond, at the bar, just ordered a martini with one of those little pineapple slices in it, complete with little pink umbrella. She's been giving you the goo-goo eyes for the past three hours and you only looked over there twice. I caught you looking."

"Of course I was looking," Lassiter insisted, "She's a very attractive woman."

"You weren't looking at her, you were looking..." The Man leaned in again, one of his hands moving to Lassiter's thigh. "...at me." The Man plunged forward, captured Lassiter's mouth in a rough, demanding kiss, sliding his hand upward. He lightly brushed against the substantial bulge in Lassiter's pants, and Lassiter moaned softly against his mouth. The Man pulled back, Lassiter almost whining at the sudden lack of contact. The Man surveyed Lassiter's kiss-swollen mouth, and hazy blue eyes and gave a wink. "You wanna get outta here?"

"Yes, let's go," Lassiter blurted, jumping to his feet. The Man grinned, turned to lead the way, then Lassiter grabbed him by the arm. "Hey, wait."

"Hmm?"

Lassiter gave him a smile. "What's your name?"

The Man leaned forward, dropped a chaste kiss against Lassiter's nose. "Shawn. My name is Shawn."


End file.
